KiCkEn sum *Ma*JoR* AsS!
this page is goin out to sum of thee greatest movies out there! i just started this page.. so right now
theres not much on here. but soon, there will be!
i thought for a while that people were starting to run outta movie ideas. cuz movies were gettin pretty
damn stupid. but then, its like they were saven the great movie ideas and throwin em at us all at once! muahaha. i wish i
was one of those genius's out there createn these funnie lines in the movies. i giggle so much when i watch funnie movies.
i wuv it.
now here are sum good movies and quotes from them.
Napoleon Dynamite! oh.. sweet, sweet napoleon! i swear to
god.. i dont know WHAT i would do without this movie. and for all you LoZeRz out there who dun like the movie.. UR FRICKEN
STUPID! ok. cuz its my favourite movie ever and its hilarious!!!!!!!!
I LOVE YOU NAPOLEON DYNAMITE!
Kid on Bus: What are you gonna do today, Napoleon?
Napoleon
Dynamite: Whatever I feel like I wanna do, gosh!
Napoleon Dynamite: Grandma just called and said you're supposed to go home.
Uncle Rico: She
didn't tell me anything.
Napoleon Dynamite: Too bad, she said she doesn't want you here when she gets back because you've
been ruining everybody's lives and eating all our steak.
Uncle Rico: I'm not goin' anywhere, Napoleon.
Napoleon
Dynamite: Get off my property!
Uncle Rico: It's a free country. I can do whatever I want.
Napoleon Dynamite: Get off
my property or I'll call the cops on you.
Uncle Rico: Well then do it! Go on!
Napoleon Dynamite: Maybe I will, GOSH!
Don: Hey, Napoleon. What did you do last summer again?
Napoleon Dynamite: I told you! I spent
it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!
Don: Did you shoot any?
Napoleon Dynamite: Yes, like 50
of 'em! They kept trying to attack my cousins, what the heck would you do in a situation like that?
Don: What
kind of gun did you use?
Napoleon Dynamite: A freakin' 12-gauge, what do you think?
Uncle Rico: So how are things going with you and your
girlfriend?
Kip:Well, I think it's getting
pretty serious. We chat online for like two hours a day so yeah, you could
say it's getting pretty serious.
Napoleon Dynamite: I like your sleeves. They're real
big.
Deb: Thank you. I made them myself.
Kip: I'm just really trying to raise a few bucks now so I
can bring her out for a few days.
Uncle Rico:
Yeah, well what does she look like?
Kip: She's uh... she's got sandy blonde hair. She's uh... pretty good looking face, but I'm just getting really... just
kinda TO'd because... I mean she hasn't even sent me a full body shot
yet.
Napoleon Dynamite: Just tell her to come get me.
Kip: Why?
Napoleon Dynamite: Cause
I don't feel good!
Kip: Well, have you talked to the school nurse?
Napoleon Dynamite: No, she doesn't know anything.
Will you just come get me?
Kip: No.
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, will you do me a favor then? Can you bring
me my chapstick?
Kip: No, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite: But my lips hurt real bad!
Kip: Just borrow some from the
school nurse. I know
she has like five sticks in her drawer.
Napoleon Dynamite: I'm not gonna use hers,
you sicko!
Kip: See ya.
Napoleon Dynamite: Ugh! Idiot!
Finding Nemo.. ah.. Finding Nemo. must be one of the greatest cartoon movies
ever! and ive seen it like a thousand times! becca calls it "little nemo" hehehe <3
well theres gonna be lots of quotes
for this one, cuz its such a great movie!
Sheldon: I'm H2O intolerant.
[sneezes]
Gill: To the top of Mount Wanna-hock-a-loogie.
Dory: What is it with men and asking for directions?
[the fish have managed to roll into the ocean in their plastic bags]
All: Yay!
Bloat:
Hahahaha!
Gill: We did it!
[pause]
Bloat: Now what?
Dory: Hey there, Mr. Grumpy Gills. When life gets you down do you wanna know what you've
gotta do?
Marlin: No I don't wanna know.
Dory: [singing] Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming,
swimming, swimming. What do we do? We swim, swim.
Marlin: Dory, no singing.
Dory: [continuing] Ha, ha, ha, ha, ho.
I love to swim. When you want to swim you want to swim.
Marlin: Now I'm stuck with that song... Now it's in my head.
Dory:
Sorry.
Dory: I saw a boat.
Marlin: You did?
Dory: Yeah, it went by not too long ago.
Follow me.
[few seconds later]
Dory: Would you quit it? What, the ocean isnt big enough for you or something like
that? You got a problem? Huh? Do ya, do ya, do ya? You wanna piece of me? Yeah, yeah! Ooh, I'm scared now! What?
Marlin:
What? You said you saw a boat.
Dory: A boat?
Marlin: YES.
Dory: Hey, I've seen a boat. It went by not too long
ago. It went... this way. It went this way.
Marlin: Wait a minute, you already told me which way the boat went.
Dory:
I did? Oh, no...
Dory: How about we play a game?
Marlin: Alright.
Dory: Okay, I'm thinking of something
orange, and it's small...
Marlin: It's me.
Dory: Right!
[Later]
Dory: I'm thinking of something orange and
small...
Marlin: Me again.
Dory: Alright, Mr. Smartypants...
[Later]
Dory: ... It's orange and small, and
has stripes...
Marlin: Me, and the next one - just a guess - me.
Dory: Okay, that's just scary.
[about the humpback whale]
Dory: Maybe he only speaks "whale".
[slowly and deeply,
imitating the whale]
Dory: Mmmmoooooowaaaaah...
Marlin: Dory. Dory, this is not "whale". You're speaking like "upset
stomach".
[after whale blows Marlin and Dory out]
Marlin: THAAAANKKK YOUUUUU SIRRRRRRR.
Dory:
Wow. I wish I could speak whale...
Dory: I shall call him squishy and he shall be mine and he shall be my squishy Come on, squishy
Come on, little squishy
[baby talk]
Dory: Ow Bad squishy, bad squishy
Gill: From this moment on, you shall now be known as Sharkbait.
Bloat, Gurgle, Bubbles:
Sharkbait! Hoo ha ha!
Gill: Welcome, Brother Sharkbait!
Bloat, Gurgle, Bubbles: Sharkbait! Hoo ha ha!
Gill: Enough
with the Sharkbait.
Gurgle: Sharkbait! Hoo... bop pa doo.
Dory: [dreaming] Uhhh... the sea monkeys have my money... yes, I'm a natural blue...
Pearl: Hey. You guys made me ink
Marlin: Okay, a mollusk walks up to this sea cucumber, well he doesn't actually walk,
he's just there, and he turns to the sea cucumber, and... Well, wait, there's a mollusk and a sea cucumber and...
Chum:
You know for a clown fish, he's not that funny.
Bubbles: Bubbles. Bubbles. My bubbles.
Dory: Hello. My name is Dory. I don't think I've ever eaten a fish.
[the sharks applaud]
Dory: Whew. Glad I got that off my chest.
Bubbles: So, the Big Blue. What's it like?
Nemo: Umm... big... and blue?
Bubbles:
I knew it.
[Large explosion occurs underwater with a small bubble reaching the surface, popping next
to Pelican 1. Pelican 2 looks at him, upset]
Pelican 2: [Disgusted] Nice.
[Flies away]
Bloat: You must pass through the Ring of Fire.
[pause]
Bloat: The RING OF FIRE.
Jacques. You said you could do it.
Jacques: Ooops, sorry.
Nemo: What's that?
Tad: I know what that is. Sandy Plankton saw one. He called it...
uh... he said it was called a "butt".
Pearl: That's a pretty big butt.
[swims out a little]
Sheldon: Oh, look
at me. I'm gonna touch the butt.
Gurgle: Curse you, Aqua Scum.
Crush: Cuz we were like, "woaaaah.", and I was like, "woaaaah." and you were like, "woaaahh..."
Dory: Excuse me? Little fella? We were wondering if...
Marlin: Dory? I'm a little
fella, and... I don't think that's a little fella.
Gill: Fish aren't meant to be in a box, kid. It does things to them.
[the whale groans]
Dory: Okay, he either said, "move to the back of the throat," or
he "wants a root beer float".
Marlin: Something's wrong with you, really. You're wasting my time.
Dory: [Reading a door] Hey, look. "Esc-a-pay". Hey, it's spelled just like escape.
Marlin:
Why didnt you tell me you could read?
Dory: I can read? I CAN READ!
Marlin: We did it, we did it oh yeah yeah yeah! No eating here tonight, Woo!
Marlin,
Dory: Eating here tonight!
Dory: No no no eating here tonight, your on a diet!
Bloat: I'm from Bob's Fish Mart
Bubbles: Fish-O-Rama.
Gurgle: Pet Palace.
Deb:
Mail Order.
Peach: Ebay.
[as Bruce bangs against the door of the sunken ship]
Dory: Who is it?
Marlin:
Dory, help me find a way out!
Dory: [to Bruce] Sorry. Could you come back later? We're trying to escape.
Marlin: I promised I'd never let anything happen to him.
Dory: Hmm. That's a funny
thing to promise.
Marlin: What?
Dory: Well you can't never let anything happen to him. Then nothing would ever happen
to him. Not much fun for little Harpo.
Dory: Your son Chico?
Marlin: Nemo
Dory: Right. Got it.
Dumb and Dumberer.. oh how funnie. yippie skippie.
this movie cracks me up!
Mrs. Dunne: Time for bed.
Lloyd Christmas: Can I be on top?
Harry: Only if I can be
on bottom.
Lloyd Christmas: Alright!
Lloyd Christmas: Chicks are for fags!
Harry: You found my treasure? Why didn't you tell me?
Lloyd Christmas: Three words:
I did.
Lloyd Christmas: Somebody chipped my tooth!
Harry: How do you think I feel? Somebody
bit me in the forehead!
Lloyd Christmas: You know you're the first person I ever brought here, Harry?
Harry
Dunne: Is this your special place?
Lloyd Christmas: No, I just usually eat in the crapper. Saves time. You know, out with
the old, in with the new.
[Harry is about to throw away Lloyd's chipped tooth]
Lloyd: No! Wait - save it for
the Tooth Fairy.
Harry: I happen to know for a fact that my mother is the Tooth Fairy.
Lloyd: No way! Your mom's the
Tooth Fairy?
Harry: Yeah, she flies around at night while I'm asleep.
Lloyd: Well nice to meet you. I'm Lloyd Christmas.
Harry: Well, I'll be. Here I am bragging about how my mom's the Tooth Fairy and you're dad's Santa Claus!
Lloyd Christmas: There's gonna be chicks all over us. It's gonna be so faggy I don't think
I can stand it.
Lloyd: [Lloyd is introducing Turk to Harry] This is my moehawk friend, Turk. He's apart
of the cool crowd.
Turk: Shut up, ass face!
Lloyd: That's the Iroquois nickname they gave me for having a strong face
of an ass.
White Chicks.. ahh ahh what a HILARIOUS movie! muahahahahahah me and corey wuv
to pretend we're having BF'S haha!
Heather Vandergeld: Your mother is so stupid, that she started exercising to lose weight,
when she could just get a liposuction, or something.
Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] You wanna talk about our mothers,
oh, ok
Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] Well, your mother's so old, that her breast milk, is actually powder, see,
she breast feeds like this,
[blows powder from hand, and everyone starts to laugh]
Latrell Spencer: Once you go black; you'll need a wheelchair.
[Marcus, dressed as Tiffany, lays down to tan, and closes eyes]
Marcus Copeland: [as
Tiffany Wilson] Ah, What a beautiful sunny day
[Latrell walks over and blocks the sun]
Latrell Spencer: Easy White
chocolate, wouldn't want you to melt
Tiffany Wilson: I am so... frick-in' pissed!
Elf! yay this movies HILARIOUS.. not even kiddin you! i watch this movie
and laugh every time! yaaaay
[Buddy sees the mail room for the first time]
Buddy: It's just like Santa's workshop!
Except it smells like mushrooms... and everyone looks like they wanna hurt me...
[answering the phone]
Buddy: Buddy the Elf! What's your favorite color?
Walter: [whispering] I think we should call security.
Deb: [whispering] Good idea.
Buddy: [whispering] I like to whisper too!
Buddy: You're not Santa. You smell like beef and cheese! You don't smell like Santa.
[Buddy burps loudly]
Buddy: Did you hear that?
[Buddy is pressing the elevator buttons at the same time]
Buddy: It looks like a Christmas
tree.
Gimbel's Manager: There's no singing in the North Pole.
Buddy: Yes there is.
Gimbel's
Manager: No, theres not.
Buddy: Yes there is.
Buddy: SANTA! OH MY GOD! SANTA'S COMING! I KNOW HIM! I KNOW HIM!
Gimbel's Manager: This is the north pole.
Buddy: No its not.
GImbel's Manager: Yes, it is.
Buddy: No its not.
Gimbel's Manager: Yes, it is.
Buddy: No its not.. wheres the snow?
Buddy: I thought maybe we could make ginger bread houses, and eat cookie dough, and go
ice skating, and maybe even hold hands.
Buddy: First we'll make snow angels for a two hours, then we'll go ice skating, then we'll
eat a whole roll of Tollhouse Cookiedough as fast as we can, and then we'll snuggle.
[reacting to sign saying "World's Best Cup of Coffee"]
Buddy: You did it! Congratulations!
World's best cup of coffee! Great job, everybody! It's great to be here.
Buddy: I'm a cotton-headed ninny-muggins.
[Being beaten up by a dwarf he thinks is an elf]
Buddy: He's an *angry* elf!
Buddy: [as he is hit by a snowball] SON of a NUTcracker!
Emily: We can't just throw him out in the snow.
Walter: Why not? He loves the snow.
He's told me 15 times.
Eugene: [brainstorming for a new book] What about this: a tribe of asparagus children,
but they're self-conscious about the way their pee smells.
Buddy: Good news! I saw a dog today!
Dodgeball is so fricken hilarious. omg ... funnie.
Patches O'Houlihan: If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball!
Patches O'Houlihan: If you can dodge traffic, you can dodge a ball!
White Goodman: Go ahead, make your jokes, Mr. Jokey... Joke-maker. But let me hit you
with some knowledge. Quit now. Save yourself the embarrassment of losing with these losers in Las Vegas, La Fleur.
Peter
La Fleur: Alliteration aside, I'll take my chances in the tournament.
White Goodman: Yeah, you will take your chances.
Peter La Fleur: I know. I just said that.
White Goodman: I know you did.
Peter La Fleur: I'm not sure where you're
going with this.
White Goodman: I'm not sure where you're going with this.
Peter La Fleur: That's what I said.
White
Goodman: That's what I'm saying to you.
Peter La Fleur: All right.
White Goodman: Touché.
White Goodman: Your "gym" is a skidmark on the underpants of society.
White Goodman: Oh, hello, Kate. I wasn't aware I was paying you to "socialize".
Kate
Veatch: You're not. I'm off the clock.
White Goodman: Well, isn't that convenient for you? And the clock.
Patches O'Houlihan: Its like watching a bunch of retards trying to hump a doorknob out there.
Peter La Fleur: Hey, White. I didn't think that Nazi camp got out until eight. Did you
decide to skip arts and crafts?
White Goodman: Yes, I did.
Peter La Fleur: [after being eliminated by a girl scout] You were adopted, your parents
don't love you!
White Goodman: Here at Globo Gym we're better than you, and we know it.
Peter La Fleur: Too bad Hallmark doesn't make a "Sorry your dodgeball coach got killed
by two tons of irony" card.
White Goodman: We should mate.
Kate Veatch: What?
White Goodman: Date! We should
date some time. Socially. Go out and kick it.
[looks like she's choking]
White Goodman: Are you okay?
Kate Veatch:
I'm fine. I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
White Goodman: In some cultures, they only eat vomit. I never been
there, but I read about it in a book.
Dwight: We could sell blood and semen.
[everyone gives him a strange look]
Dwight:
What? Not mixed together.
White Goodman: There's no reason we need to be shackled by the strictures of the employee-employer
relationship. Unless you're into that sort of thing. In which case, I got some shackles in the back. I'm just kidding. But
seriously, I've got 'em.
Peter La Fleur: Hang on a second. You wanna become a cheerleader to prove you are not
a loser?
Justin: Yeah. Why?
Peter La Fleur: Nothing. High school's changed a bit since I was a kid.
White Goodman: Oh, I don't think I'm a lot dumber than you think that I thought I once
was.
White Goodman: At Globo Gym we understand that "ugliness" and "fatness" are genetic disorders,
much like baldness or necrophilia, and it's only your fault if you don't hate yourself enough to do something about it.
Patches O'Houlihan: Sometimes you gotta grab life by the haunches and hump it into submission.
Peter La Fleur: There's someone out there for everybody.
Owen: You think?
Peter La
Fleur: Absolutely. In some cases, there's two somebodies for one person. I like to call that "the jackpot".
Cotton McKnight: Unbelievable. I have been to the Great Wall of China. I have seen the
Pyramids of Egypt. I've even witnessed a grown man satisfy a camel. But never in all my years as a sportscaster have I witnessed
something as improbable, as impossible, as what we've witnessed here.
Meet the Fockers was a hilarious moobie n i seen it with my mommie. i think
it deserves a good spot in here!
Jack Byrnes: Greg, a man reaches a certain age when he realizes what's truly important. Do
you know what that is?
Greg Focker: Love?... friendship?... just love, I think.
Jack Byrnes: His legacy.
Greg
Focker: That, too.
Jack Byrnes: If your family's circle joins in my family's circle, they'll form a chain. I can't have
a chink in my chain.
Bernie Focker: Can you believe I fathered him with just one testicle?
Pam Byrnes: I'm going to be Pamela Martha Focker! Yes, I know how that sounds!
Little Jack: ass-hole
Bernie Focker: [points to Jack] There's my brother from another mother!
Local Cop: HE'S GOT A RUBBER BOOBIE!
Jack Byrnes: Um Jack, what's the sign for sour milk, 'cause this is what it is.
Jack
Byrnes: It may be sour, because it's from Debbie's left breast.
